In a little less than a week, I am faced with the ultimatum of taking something that I feel so opposed to or losing my job.
To me I think the most disturbing part is the coworkers I was once cordial and friendly with are now the very ones to turn their backs on me and think they are above me. Pointing fingers, placing blame, shaming, talking behind my back. All because I have discernment for what I put into my body. This situation as dire and unimaginable as it is now my reality that I was hoping I would be able to awake from. But that certainly is not the case, and as I open my eyes a little wider, I am entrusted upon a journey I never wanted to be apart, but I am so grateful that I am.
Although at times it feels I am alone on this endeavor I am reminded I am not and there are so many of us out there facing the same things while feeling the same way. The uncertainty, the disbelief, being a witness to the lack of compassion. I look around and I am faced with such a difficult choice. Do I go against everything that learned to trust and disregard my intuition? Do I allow what others think is best dictate what my life should be like?
When I look at my family, I am once again reassured they give me the strength I need in order to overcome what I am facing now. This is for them. This is for me, this is for us.
For the healthcare system who “wants the best for everyone” who claims this is for everyone’s health. Where were you when we were in the brink of it and were told to keep the N95 for weeks, some places all year long? Where were you when the community was showing their appreciation for all of our hard work and dedication? A system where the higher ups get paid millions of dollars in bonuses yet the unions can’t even get a reasonable offer for YOUR workforce. You know the ones that are risking it all? Remember: you wouldn’t have those bonuses if it wasn’t for the very ones you are pushing down. For those of you blinded by the “uplifting” words, I have compassion for you, even if you are the ones who are also doing the pushing. As Jesus’ so notoriously says, “forgive them for they know not what they do.” Tell me again, how you support your essential workers while simultaneously kicking them to the curb without a second thought? Ill wait.
From my understanding, for every unvaccinated person, they would have to pay a fine. That is why they are refusing to allow people to stay in the healthcare system who are declining it. They refuse to acknowledge religious and medical exemptions. How could you care so much about us when you are so blatantly disrespecting us?
Imagine that, a healthcare system whose main concern is money and total control. Where do you think this is headed? Do you honestly believe it is for your health? Do you truly believe in everything they are saying and doing? Do you think it is empowering to have someone take control of your health and not have your best interests at heart? How do you really think this will play out?
There are many doctors and scientists being silenced for trying to come forth. Many people who are raising valid concerns are being shunned. People who have come forth in saying adverse reactions have occurred were told they were crazy. How could the vaccine do that? What else needs to occur for those of you not acknowledging what is happening to us? What more needs to be said for those who hold the power to stop this madness? Who else is involved in these crimes against humanity?
Remember, this is how many instances played out in history. Do we need to really travel down the same roads? Have we not learned anything from past mistakes? Do we really think that this could never happen to us? When will we open our eyes and take back our power? Did you forget how Hitler came to be? That those soldiers were also just doing their jobs?
To think, I used to be so proud to be a healthcare worker. I was proud to work for this organization. I spoke so highly of them. Now I am disgusted that I have been so blinded by their true intentions. Their actions have proved to be appalling.
I truly hope that those who are pointing fingers are able to see past the illusions that are blinding them. Perhaps have compassion for their family, friends, coworkers and fellow humans. But either way, I will continue to love and support them while respecting their decisions.
I joined healthcare to help others, to better serve my community. Healthcare isn’t designed for that anymore though. You are scathed if you are too compassionate, given a set of cards to say key points and disregard people when they have legitimate claims by passing them off in circles.
I recall vividly years ago when I was a nursing assistant how difficult it was to prioritize care to the patients because I was spread so thin. I wanted to be a listening ear and comforting shoulder in such a trivial time in their lives. But I needed to get everything done in a shift. What they emphasized the most was hourly rounding, nope can’t forget that hourly rounding! Why you ask? It helps with press ganey scores. Why? So they get paid. What about those patients who are unable to fill out that survey? Aren’t they missing out too? I ran in circles and ran myself in the ground. At what cost? This past year as a phlebotomist I remember seeing all those patients suffering. But I also saw the beauty of everyone coming together for a greater good. I saw the outpouring of love from our community. We did it together. The only thing that our corporation, oh sorry healthcare system did, was give us a bonus that our union fought for. Why, you ask? Publicity. Not because they cared, if they did, they would have been on the frontlines with us, supporting us as our community had.
Now, those very people who put their life on the lines for everyone including you and your families, are losing their livelihood. Where is the support now? Where is the love now?
Science isn’t one sided. I don’t know where everything went downhill. But I can assure you, this is not what I signed up for when I joined healthcare.
A reminder for everyone: Do what you need to do and what you think is best for your family. I know I am.
A fed up healthcare worker.